Parent and Family

Your son’s bedroom floor is covered with clothes, once more. You really feel your anger rising that he just doesn’t listen to your requests to put his clothes in his hamper. A good parenting tip correct now is to tell your child how this makes you feel, and then, ask him to help you out. Positive parenting can turn this around into a lesson about respect.

Children are emotional, and recognize feelings well. However, we don’t usually confide our feelings to them. Instead, we present a stern face, telling them rules, without explaining the impact of their poor behaviour.

Instead of yelling at your son to pick up his clothes, explain to him that when he leaves his clothes on the floor, it’s you who has to pick them up. You’ve put your own clothes in the appropriate place, and you’ve tidied up the rest of the house, and now you’re tired. Then, ask politely if he could please pick up his own clothes.

Speak calmly, and stay away from blame. All your child actually wants is to feel secure about your relationship, and to feel loved. If you assign blame to your child, it can be frightening for them to believe they have caused you pain or triggered your anger.

Youngsters need to know that everyone has feelings, including you, and that it is appropriate to share your feelings. Then, by making a request and asking their help to solve the dilemma, you are teaching them how to resolve all kinds of complicated issues that might arise later on in life.

Your child also needs to know that quite a few issues in your life affect your emotions. You can even tell them “Mommy had a really challenging day at the office right now, and it’s made me really tired. Would you mind just helping me put away the dishes?”

By confiding in your child, and telling them how you really feel, you are showing your child that you respect them sufficient to share your feelings with them. You’re also teaching them an critical life lesson. You’re showing them that it’s okay to talk about your emotions, and that when you share how you feel, and ask for help, it makes you feel much better.

If you’re just too angry proper now, it’s okay to share that emotion as well. “I’m quite upset right now”. I am not upset with you. I’m feeling angry and upset right now. Could you give me a couple of minutes for me to clear my head?”

Telling your child what you are really feeling is far far better than pretending everything is fine, when they can definitely tell that you’re angry. It’s also greater than putting the blame on them.

The next time your child does something you don’t like, try some positive parenting and tell them how you really feel. Keep in mind the critical parenting ideas of making use of the word “I”, and speaking in a straightforward, calm manner. Then, ask your child to aid you so that the task can get completed.